Crying and praying 😭🙏

so I recently got diagnosed with Asd I have a major fear of being alone/rejection my entire life I don't cope well alone have struggled to find love but is the main reason I want to be loved as I cope much better with a careing and understanding women I never feel safe even in my own home or in public my brain associates being in solitude with pain ive struggled financially or to provide that security for myself not being able to hold a Job ive tried many things to maintain my happiness but I can't seem to enjoy myself anymore or being alone is their anyone who allso is going through this