Speaking from a generation whose parents never got them tested, I would say do your research and start to develop skills that help you the best. Trial and error occurs a lot here. Example - I love writing lists but I always manage to misplace it almost instantly, so for important things, I have to set alarms on my phone, etc. Another thing would be to simply ask your parents why and try for open communication as best as possible.

if you’re above 18 you could get tested online. the only problem is it’s like $125, but you can submit a claim to your insurance company to be reimbursed. I used ADHD online and it matches you with a psych in your state to evaluate you

There are plenty of resources out there for learning to live with ADHD, and tips and tricks for making life more bearable. I'm sorry you don't have access to better help right now, but learn to advocate for yourself and maybe us reasons like "depression is lowering my quality of life, and I think a therapist and psychiatrist would be able to help me" and don't worry about bringing up ADHD to them, save that for any doctor/therapist/psychiatrist you are able to go to, and ask to speak to them privately. ADHD has historically had a bad reputation as a "behavioral disorder" which means a lot of people think it's either bad to have the diagnosis, or a crutch for bad behavior. If your parents have that misconception, it'll be hard to prove it to them otherwise.

It's frustrating to deal with this, but it's important to remember that your parents love you and are just doing what they think is best, even if it might not really be. (Sidenote: I was never diagnosed as a child and sought treatment this year for the first time. When I talked to my family about it, EVERYONE said they knew I had adhd but didn't want me to take medicine so they didn't test me 🤦🏻‍♀️. It was incredibly frustrating and made me pretty angry for a while, but I have to remember they had their reasons for the choices they made.) If you aren't able to control your own healthcare it can seem like there aren't options, but everyone here is right that there are tons of helpful tips for dealing with the symptoms of adhd. I lived my whole life doing some of these things and not even realizing why! I also work as a teacher with MANY students who deal with neurodivergencies and disabilities. I'm happy to chat if you want any specific recommendations for things to try 😊