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Ameliaa

Updated 1y ago

Managing Anxiety: Taking it Out on Others

I feel like I’m taking my anxiety out on others, which I never do and I feel bad about it which gives me more anxiety. What should I do?

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sammieeee

2y

I have that similar issue - I yelled at my mom because she's my anxietys trigger point (she blames me for everything then calls me crazy when I confront her then she says I'm majorly depressed even tho I'm not 💀 - I have no symptoms and I'm relatively neutral like all the time)
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Ameliaa

2y

ya I get that. My mom makes me so anxious and if I say one rude thing she flips out and makes it into something big.
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Woo

2y

Hiii! This sounds like it could be an emotional regulation issue. It might take some time to learn, but you have to learn how to feel and release your emotions in a healthy way instead of reacting immediately. We can’t control how we feel but we can control how we react. So when something triggering happens, take a breath and tell the person that you need a moment to collect yourself but you’ll be back later. Go into another room or outside, drop down into your body and try not to listen to the narrative your brain will be spinning, and try to feel the physical sensations of your emotions. For example, when I’m mad, I get very tense in my chest area and I feel like I’m overheating. Once you recognize those feelings, just sit with them and breathe through them until there gone. Breathe in for 4 and out for 4. If you’re really angry, yell into a pillow or hit a pillow. Once the feeling is out, you can go back to the person more calm. And you need to discuss what triggers you with those that you love so they know. Use I feel statements, set a boundary, and follow through if you need to. Example “I feel triggered when you raise your voice when you’re frustrated, even though I know you’re not mad. Could you please try to use a neutral voice when discussing sensitive subjects with me? Otherwise, I will need to pause the discussion if my anxiety flares up and calm myself down in another room” Also, apologies and accountability go a long way! If you feel bad cuz your anxiety caused you to treat someone you love badly, apologize and let them know you see that it’s wrong and tell them how you will change that behavior in the future. They will still love you.
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Ameliaa

2y

thank you so much! I’m going to try and use those tips.
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EvilMadood09

2y

I feel the same when I get home I’m so tired from being anxious all day and then I take it out on others and it ends really badly
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Ameliaa

2y

totally get that, I am still in school which makes my anxiety super high and I don’t feel like talking when I get home so I get annoyed when people try to talk to me.
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astraea93

2y

If you have the ability, I'd talk with a therapist or counselor about coping skills. It's taken me a few years, but it's really helped in my journey. Also, prioritizing my physical and mental health has helped reduce my lashing out at others when I'm anxious or panicking.

The content in this post is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.

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