I've been where you're at. feel free to message me if you'd like. if you want to talk or you need someone to listen. I'm a mom. i have 9 months clean from my drug of choice.

After I had my 2nd child I decided to do IV drugs such as meth being my first time ever doing a drug then I lost my kids I'm sober now for going on 3years my daughter was 1 and 1/2 when I lost her and my son was 6months old.... they are 10 and 9 now... my 1st husband went to prison for messing with my youngest sister who was 14 at the time... he got me pregnant on purpose with my son and I found out he'd been blowing our money on meth so I wanted to see what the big deal was... I got hooked for 6yrs and now I'm finally clean but my kids have been with their grandmother so long and I'm still not stable enough to get them back but I also seen on intervention afterwards tv show and a woman made it clear that if she got her kids back it'd be selfish because they'd been there for a while and it made me realize if I was to try and get my kids back especially with my living situation not being ideal that it'd be selfish of me... I hated moving around when I was a kid and I don't want that for my kids... I hope you can stay sober for your unborn child so you and ur child can have the relationship you and the baby deserve!! Hopefully my story helps. My reason for getting clean is my kids I didn't want to have track marks and my kids see them and ask what they was... but I'm still having a hard time getting their grandma to let me see them or even talk to them on video chat but when they do get to see me they are the happiest and it makes me want to continue to be a better me. I gave up thinking I had nothing but I didn't realize what I had till they was gone I hope you never have to feel that loss!!!

Yes yes yes ❤️ I can't stress enough how crazily different my life is right now from 18 months ago, and how grateful I am. After 10+ years of substance and alcohol abuse I went to a rehab in a different city, initially for 3 months. 5 weeks before I went I was supposed to go to a different place, but tried to end my life and so was in hospital so I couldn't go. Self sabotage loud and clear, I genuinely believed I'd be better off dead than try and fail at another rehab. But I got to rehab, eventually. When I was there, I slept with another resident and only went and got pregnant 😂 jokes aside, I have a history of unstable, codependent and usually toxic relationships, so the staff at the rehab were worried to say the least. But I took it as a sign, to live and try to be the best person I could be for my son. I ended up staying in rehab for 6 months, rebuilt my relationship with my family, and now I love with my 8 month old boy and his dad, who is also in recovery. It hasn't been easy, at all. But my god it's worth it! Good luck!