autism tests are unfortunately very inaccurate most of the time. people are left undiagnosed constantly, especially if they're anything other than a cis white boy. if you think you have autism, then you probably do-- there's absolutely no harm in self-diagnosis and it's perfectly valid in the autistic community because everyone knows about the ridiculous barriers getting in the way of official diagnosis. i would suggest looking into autism resources and seeing if you can find anything worthwhile or anything that helps you. and getting tested for autism as an adult is even harder than when you're a kid with an even high chance of getting brushed off. however, it's not impossible, and if you want to try again, just make sure that you have insurance that can cover the test because it can be expensive. it's also harder to find clinics that test adults instead of just children, so you might need to some research to find one depending on where you live. but either way, it's important to remember that you know yourself better than the doctors do and once again there's no harm in identifying as autistic without a proper dx. i'm sorry this is something you're dealing with, but i hope it works out for you and that you're able to find a better clinic in the future!

I hate that an autism assessment later in life involves them talking to your parents. if my parents had noticed anything, I wouldn't be just getting a diagnosis in my 20s

I was diagnosed at 17 myself but I'm wanting to get retested now that I'm an adult. I even go as far as to say that I don't have autism. I'm sure how I was diagnosed was through what my mom saw when I was growing up. But you do what's best for you.

I got tested at 15 and at 25 both said I had it. The circumstances were different and the test was different and not only questions. It was a comprehensive mental health condition test as well so it was spread through three appointments, an hour each.

Many people who have BPD also have a lesser-known condition called Pathological Demand Avoidance, a specific profile of autism only diagnosed in the UK. Symptoms often include those of what is traditionally thought of as autism, alongside: even simple demands/responsibilities/ activities (usually those with less immediate reward purpose, incentive or urgency) feeling agitating or anxiety inducing leading to avoidance, having delayed social awareness but not struggling with understanding social situations as much as most with autism, being excessively social, having a need for control, difficulty making decisions, acting different around each person (lacking a social identity) or lacking a sense of being perceived by others, hating being controlled or told what to do implicitly or not, impulsivity and mood swings, being prone to anger or meltdown when pushed too far (when combined with BPD this can be explosive), utilizing lying/ manipulation to avoid doing what is expected, procrastinating doing entire projects until right before the deadline, and obsessing over people (or fictional characters) and their behaviors. Some people with this disorder might argue seemingly without a purpose, even going so far as to attempt to bait people into arguments. Others might be very agreeable and do what they believe they are wanted to as a means of exerting control over how they are perceived. And others often switch between the two based on the situation or who they are around. Keep in mind each symptom/behavior associated with PDA is likely to be experienced inconsistently and depend on the setting. That all being said, while less common, autism without a PDA profile can occur with BPD as well.